All of these beautiful ocean eyes,
they keep giving me highs.
High highs and low lows,
I seem to attract them,
wherever I go.
I've kept falling for these ocean eyes with different faces,
all unique in their own way,
but similar traits in emotional stages.
I have loved them since I was a child,
we seemed to be drawn to each other,
and they always made me smile.
But the smiles never lasted long,
because me and other counterparts would trigger each other,
and both instinctively fight strong.
The feelings of chemistry and passion turned into confusion,
and now I've realized that most of it was just an illusion.
An illusion of what we thought love should mean,
when in reality, we were just battling ourselves to feel seen.
Ocean eyes have always been near.
I started to wonder why,
but now I have become aware.
That the ocean eyes were my greatest catalysts,
because my brain has been searching for a familiar sensation since childhood,
in the form of a dopamine hit.
Who would have known that all along I was always searching for you?
Inside this childhood wound, from eyes so gray, green and blue.
05.04.2024,
Lina Tivaporn Hed
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